The Best Things in Life
Being in the world, out in nature, with these two souls.
Enjoying the calm, peace, and grandeur of nature.
The rest of world is chaotic and frustrating and stressful - but we have each other, and we are alright. ♥
you can’t save everybody
Being with ultra compassionate and empathy-driven friends, this is something we’ve been learning — and still struggle with.
Or maybe that people can be saved - but not by me.
There’s a limit of what can be done; there’s a limit of how much can be given; there’s a limit to capability and capacity.
I spoke tenderly to a friend last week about how there’s a part of me that wanted to be the hero. I wanted to take pride in being the savior. There’s so much history loaded there with my role in my family and the pain I wanted to take away (and absorb!!!) from my parents. If I could hold it, maybe they wouldn’t have to suffer. I was young, I had so much capacity, I could be their container.
I think that showed up in some of my hardest moments in life, too.
If I don’t have needs or wants, I could make sure others will be released from their suffering.
Martyr mentality! WHOOF!!!…….
Cultivating a Creative Practice
Since I began my daily meditation + painting practice, I’ve had these post-its around me.
To lessen the pressure of “doing things right,” perfectionism, and immediately think about making things into sellable products, it helped to focus on CURIOSITY.
What happens if I do this?
What if I show up every morning and do this?
How can I engage in PLAY with my creativity again?
WHAT is my creativity right now?
It’s clear my creative endeavors rarely stay stagnant. Likely the reason why I love working in Innovation — I never get bored!
But my goal right now isn’t to hustle and chase the unachievable. My goal right now is to create a sustainable, long-lasting life….
wisdom from my future self
Where am I?
What am I like?
What do I love to do?
What advice could I give my present self?
Have FUN! Go swim in the river!
You’ve already gotten so far in becoming yourself.
You still have youth, health, vivacity!
Your visions, ideas, inventions won’t disappear. Things can rest for a day or two.
You’re on the right track….
i’m creating my own ecoSYSTEM
One with less hustle.
One with less dehumanizing.
One that embraces natural rhythms of inspiration, rest, incubation, creation, research, down time, space for mental rollercoasters, exploration, gardening, doing things just because, and joy-filled days.
I believe it’s possible.
I believe I can design that for myself.
I’m creating a system….
What does a SUSTAINABLE life look like for me?
I’m speaking less about eco-consciousness but rather about having a long-lasting, enduring, resilient system, way of living, way of being that continuously breathes and grows with me.
What are the BIG players for my ecosystem?…..
breathe easy
ahahahha going onto Instagram feels like I’m being pummeled with a barrage of sounds and stimulation - and I have deleted it from my phone already after making that one reel the other day. ahahhahaha
Things I’m learning to accept and understand about this phase right now:
I do much better with quiet
I do much better with controlled input to my nervous system, mind, attention, and focus
There’s no need to feel guilty or selfish for that. It just is.
My creativity and mental health THRIVES without the external noise.
My creativity and mental health THRIVES in my day-to-day life with……
can there be a new way of making things?
How might I move away from social media to engage with my audience?
Is it possible to build a brand in the modern era without exploiting the attention, social media addiction, and (already diminishing) energy of my followers and supporters?
I want to create to nourish, to replenish, to provide reprieve for my friends, family, and followers of my work. How might I do that?
And - can my art do that for people?
Power in Compounding
Taking learnings in financial wealth building - it’s about compounding. The key to building a strong, stable foundation. A little at a time goes a long way.
Part of my mental health and creative practice integration means I still need to meditate and paint freely several times a week to show my mind + body + soul that I’m here for it. That inner Estella can still create and BE as she desires, even with the flurry of exciting huge things in the winds….
Every morning is an opportunity for a new start
No one is stopping you.
No one is making the rules.
You can change, set into motion, change, and BE whoever you want to be - TODAY.
No need to ask for permission. You just can.
Your life is your own. Your path is your own.
What will you do with the opportunity before you?
There’s No Perfectionism in Buddhism.
The answer isn’t in doing this right.
Remember to sit in the quiet - the yin.
You’ll find your answers within.
You’ll find your answers withyin LOLOLOLHELP….
Rewiring Neurosystems
The early stages of moving from Scorpio South Node (intensity, transformation) to Taurus North Node (stability, embodiment) often involve creating structured routines as a necessary foundation. However, the mature expression of Taurus energy isn't rigidity but adaptable stability—like a tree that's firmly rooted yet flexible enough to bend with the wind.
From a neurobiological perspective, this is part of the recalibration process. Your nervous system first needs consistent routines to establish safety, but eventually needs to develop flexibility within stability….